Your free, funny Aquarius horoscope for today

Aquarius

Birth date: 20 January - 18 February

The following is your Aquarius horoscope for today, a funny zodiac reading especially for you.

God is very much a vengeful god, so watch out for falling pianos. (God is also a 'Laurel and Hardy' fan.) Take everything you've got and run like the wind. Bad things are afoot. I mean, can't you smell it?

Take time out to consider your options; climb a mountain, dig your own grave.

Try to avoid reading dusty old books that call themselves 'tomes'. Especially if they contain remarkably detailed information about the coming of the anti-christ.

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