Your free, funny Aquarius horoscope for today

Astrological sign for Aquarius

Aquarius

Birth date: 20 January - 18 February

The following is your Aquarius horoscope for today, a funny zodiac reading especially for you.

Danger. Excitement. Love. Hate. These are words which are often used in movie advertisements, but very rarely happen in your life. This week may be the beginning of a startling change for you.

Parts of you feel like giving up the ghost today, but feeding those parts with ice-cream and bacon bits may revive them, to an extent.

The only conspiracy theory you need to worry about is the one that involves you. You knew about that conspiracy, right? Oh....dear...God.

The day's events will make you want to move abroad.

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