Your free, funny Aquarius horoscope for today

Astrological sign for Aquarius

Aquarius

Birth date: 20 January - 18 February

The following is your Aquarius horoscope for today, a funny zodiac reading especially for you.

Death can stalk you in all forms, even cute little pussy cats and slugs. Beware of all cats who have slugs attached to their backs. Applying yourself to your work may be the only way you can crush the thoughts that rampage through your ill-mind.

Dressing as a feline may give others cause for concern today.

"Thinking strategically" is a cop-out. You did what you did because you're a selfish competitive little person.

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