Your Funny Aquarius Horoscope for Monday, 18th Sep 2023

To view today's horoscope, click here

Below is your horoscope for the date specified above. Some people think it's unlucky to look at old horoscopes from prior dates but we think it's important in order to be able to gauge the accuracy rates of horoscopes. So, if you want to check your old horoscopes, use our Archive Horoscopes section and enjoy yourself!

Aquarius

20 January - 18 February

If everything that's ever been said about you is true, why are you such a jackass? Avoiding the cracks on pavements can seem like a fun game, and probably is. Your ability to play this game may be affected by one or more broken legs.

Like your life, peanuts can be dried, roasted, blanched and put inside little potato coatings. Just like your life.

« Back to Horoscopes Archive

Virgo horoscope

You may feel like today has started like a horror story, but it will get better this lunchtime. The scars left on......

Full horoscope

More from Laughsend

Titanic Wreck Scanned, Celine Dion Weeps With Envy

George W Bush to Take Over as the New Host of The Price is Right and Finally Find the Weapons of Mass Destruction