Your Funny Scorpio Horoscope for Saturday, 12th Jan 2019

To view today's horoscope, click here

Below is your horoscope for the date specified above. Some people think it's unlucky to look at old horoscopes from prior dates but we think it's important in order to be able to gauge the accuracy rates of horoscopes. So, if you want to check your old horoscopes, use our Archive Horoscopes section and enjoy yourself!
star sign: Scorpio

Scorpio

24 October - 21 November

When faced with a lifetime of trauma, please remember what your mother always told you. The way you feel is not necessary limited to what you eat and drink. You may also want to go for walks and conduct yourself properly at the table.

In the ironically immortal words of the Mortal Kombat voiceover guy: Finish Him!


« Back to Horoscopes Archive

Funny stuff

Get our funny weekly newsletters straight to your inbox
Subscribe to funny newsletter
... AND CLICK
or Find out more first

Consider checking us out and following us on social media:


Aquarius horoscope

The odds are always on your side today, so don't be afraid to experiment. Christmas may seem like it's just around......

Full horoscope

More from Laughsend

Snow shock! Met Office claims, "It's not easy predicting the weather".   Paige Van Zant following second round submission win over Rachael Ostovich at UFC Fight Night 143: Bring on Valentina Shevchenko  
Write for Laughsend - it's easy and fun!
Free sign up / Login
Funny newsletter Funny RSS feed