Aries
Birth date: 21 March - 19 AprilYour Aries horoscope for today. We hope you enjoy this funny look at the day ahead - check us out on Twitter for daily updates on your funny daily horoscopes!
A nearby construction company may approach you this morning in an attempt to fool you into thinking that the world is about to explode. Telling your partner that you are better than they at sex, is probably not going to win you any favours.
Horrible smells and green patches on your body may make your day turn sour.
Today can be what you make of it: beautiful or throughly horrific.
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