Your free, funny Pisces horoscope for today

Astrological sign for Pisces

Pisces

Birth date: 19 February - 20 March

The following is your Pisces horoscope for today, free for all our funny zodiac followers.

In other countries, how you'll feel about this afternoon could get you arrested and shot... at dawn, without a blindfold, and with a stinging sensation in the groin.

Love may be in the air for one lucky person tonight. I'm talking world-wide here, not about you - UGLY!

Tomorrow, when you consider how it could have been, today is going to seem pretty damned swell.

Being mean is what makes bullies happy - don't make them have to be unhappy. Imagine what the mean spirited little twats would do then.

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