ScorpioBirth date: 24 October - 21 November
Your funny Scorpio horoscope for today has been checked for all sorts of problems, but we found none. Except that it isn't very funny for some reason. Our engineers are working on it.
Armchair politicians will affect your life today as they rise from their dank pits and begin to conquer the known world. The day's events will make you want to move abroad.
Potato salesmen may call today and leave you a spud on your doorstep.
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