Health

Apocalypse strikes world; everyone dead

Read story Apocalypse strikes world; everyone dead

World 0

In a rather unnerving moment for optimists everywhere, the world spectacularly ended overnight, with everyone assumed dead. The...

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Vaccine to cure autism hailed by anti-vaccers

World 14

A vaccine has been developed by Austrian Scientists that experts say could eradicate autism. The vaccine, labelled by the lab that developed it as STv.p1d, has particularly caught the attention of so-called "anti-vaccers", a group of obnoxiously loud radicals who believe, regardless...

Heck Yeah, America: Immortality Achievement Unlocked

US News 0

An earth-shattering breakthrough in the scientific community is changing the way Americans live. CapitalismTech, the California-based global leader of healthcare technology, discovered the medical key to immortality early last week. Chief of Development and Technology Cronk Trun...

You only live three times, says renowned James Bond enemy

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In the world of spies and spy related shenanigans, there is no better known arch-enemy than Rnst Blomee. For decades, British spy James Bond, also known as 007, has been at loggerheads with Blomee, and today Mr Bond's large, balding uber-opponent has released a statement contradicting the spy's claim that spies only live twice....

Kissing top cause of UK school nits outbreaks claim boffins

UK News 4

Boffins at Laughingstate University yesterday released a report DAMNING UK schools for allowing pupils to share bodily fluids. The act, described by scientists as KISSING, was alleged to have been allowed in up to 97% of schools, and in those schools a WHOPPING 7% of children...

Pharma company to start selling anti-viagra as answer to date-rape drugs

World 2

A pharmaceutical company based in England is set to start selling what has been dubbed as "anti-viagra", in some quarters, due to its ability to render a penis flaccid and unusable for up to 48 hours. The drug, whose chemical name is Lifeanedlis (which is Sildenafil in reverse),...