World

Read story Djokovic left devastated by Italian Open defeat
Sport 10

World number two Novak Djokovic was left devastated by his shocking straight sets defeat in the final of the Italian Open at the...

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Notable quotable from this story

From Djokovic left devastated by Italian Open defeat
"Don’t be surprised if he upsets the bookmakers and wins the trophy after the final is played on the 4th of next month the same way Stan Warinka upset me to win the title two years ago...." - see story

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Dafne Schippers considering Heptathlon return following poor showing in Prefontaine Classic

Sport 11

Reigning World 200M Champion Dafne Schippers is seriously considering a return to the heptathlon following her poor showing in the Prefontaine Classic in Eugene, Oregon yesterday where she could have only mustered up a disappointing fourth-place finish. The Dutchwoman stunned...

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New Zealand Government to forbid the use of the term "kiwi" when referring to its nationals

Politics 8

The New Zealand Government is to bring a piece of legislation to parliament which would forbid the use of the term “kiwi” when referring to its nationals. Speaking at a press conference today in Wellington, Prime Minister of New Zealand Bill English had this to say regarding the impending change:...

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Saudi Arabia bans Kappa sportswear for "offensive" logo

Politics 1

The Kingdom of Saudi Arabia has officially banned the importation and sale of products from the Italian sportswear company Kappa because of its logo which they claim is "offensive," "pornographic," "immoral" and "incompatible" with Saudi values....

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Paige Van Zant to quit MMA for modeling career

Sport 5

UFC fighter Paige Van Zant is to quit Mixed Martial Arts for a modeling career. In an interview with Fight Magazine, the former contestant on a celebrity edition of Food Network’s Chopped said...

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Martina Hingis invokes ire of Swiss public for insensitive tweet following Timea Bacsinszky's French Open semifinal loss

Sport 6

Martina Hingis - once the darling of Swiss tennis who, at 16 become the youngest women's player to win a Grand Slam Singles title in the 20th century when she upset Mary Pierce to win the Australian Open in 1997, and then went on to claim four more Grand Slam singles titles in h...

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North Korean man commits suicide after losing pictures of Dear Leaders in fire

Politics 2

A report coming out of the Yonhap News Agency says that a young North Korean man has committed suicide by slashing his throat with a shard of broken glass after losing his pictures of the country’s late Eternal President Kim Il- Sung, the late Eternal Chairman Kim Jong-il and...

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Spain to include lyrics to National Anthem

Politics 3

Spanish King Felipe VI has sent out a nation-wide request seeking for song writers who can pen lyrics to the national anthem. In an address to the nation last night, the King had this to...

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IAAF officially ratifies the World Records for Women's 100M and 200M

Sport 0

It may have taken almost 29 years, but today the IAAF has officially ratified the World Records for the women’s 100M and 200M, making the new World Record Holders American Carmelita Jeter and Dutchwoman Dafne Schippers respectively. Reading from an official statement at a pres...

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The funniest news from around the world: lampooning heads of state, silly things that happen globally, and generally just trying to out-satire mother nature (which isn't always easy by the way!) We put in approximately 14,000 man-monkey-hybrid hours into the writing of every world news headline just to make sure it's as funny as can be. Well, we don't actually do that, but you wouldn't be surprised, would you? Maybe. Sorry. I'm on work experience here and I don't really know whether this is the right thing to be writing. In the meantime, enjoy your news satire website, people!

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