World

Read story Cris Cyborg wants to fight winner of Nunes vs. Pennington in unification "super-bout"
Sport 3

The "Baddest woman on the planet," Cris Cyborg, says that she wants to take on the winner of tonight's UFC 224 fight between curr...

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Notable quotable from this story

From Cris Cyborg wants to fight winner of Nunes vs. Pennington in unification "super-bout"
"Apart from perhaps Valentina Shevchenko, how challenging were those opponents...." - see story

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Besiktas coach to ask UEFA permission to forfeit second-leg home game against Bayern Munich following devastating first-leg Champions League Round-of-16 defeat

Sport 6

A demoralized Besiktas team arrived in Istanbul this evening with their heads down and their spirits low after totally being outclassed in their round-of-16 first leg tie by a rampant Bayern Munich outfit which is hungry to win its first UEFA Champions League trophy in five year...

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Disgusted patrons walk out of circus following racist clown joke

Politics 5

Disgusted patrons at the Suarez Bros. Circus which is currently on the Trinidad leg of its world tour, were left furious and some even walked out of the performance and demanded their money back when one of the clowns did a practical joke which they deemed racist. During the...

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Football Referee makes bizarre request of team captains after losing toss coin before match

Sport 1

In a somewhat bizarre occurrence, the referee in Brazil's Campeonato Série A Football League match between Santos and Corinthians lost the toss coin just moments before the scheduled kickoff. The two opposing team captains looked on in bewilderment as the embarrassed match offi...

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All-female gang in Germany targeting male migrants

Politics 0

German Police are investigating reports of an all-female gang who are going around the city of Cologne specifically targeting male migrants of Middle Eastern and North African backgrounds for robbery and assault. The gang, which comprises of only young females of Euro-German...

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Buffon after Juventus defeat: I am destined to never win a Champions League

Sport 7

A dejected Juventus Captain Gianluigi Buffon had a pessimistic outlook about his chances of ever winning the elusive Champions League title after his side was totally outplayed and humiliated by Defending Champions Real Madrid at the Juventus Stadium in Turin by concluding:...

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Jedrzejczyk following second loss to Namajunas at UFC 223: I was robbed

Sport 16

Former Women's Strawweight Champion Joanna Jedrzejczyk is claiming that she was robbed following her unanimous decision loss to Rose Namajunas at UFC 223 last night in New York. The Polish Fighter, speaking to reporters after her failure to regain the title that she lost in spec...

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Valentina Shevchenko to try out for Peruvian National Shooting team

Sport 5

One of the most fearsome women on the planet is about to get even scarier. Two weeks after her lop-sided beat-down of the Brazilian Priscila Cachoeira, Valentina Shevchenko says that she plans to try out for the Peruvian National Shooting team with the hope of getting a chance...

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Australia Women's Cricket Captain relieved by first T20 tournament triumph in three years

Sport 9

The Australian women's National Cricket Team Captain, Meg Lanning and by extension the rest of the Southern Stars team, all breathed a sigh of relief today following their convincing 57-run win over the English women's team in the final of the Tri-Nation tournament which capped...

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The funniest news from around the world: lampooning heads of state, silly things that happen globally, and generally just trying to out-satire mother nature (which isn't always easy by the way!) We put in approximately 14,000 man-monkey-hybrid hours into the writing of every world news headline just to make sure it's as funny as can be. Well, we don't actually do that, but you wouldn't be surprised, would you? Maybe. Sorry. I'm on work experience here and I don't really know whether this is the right thing to be writing. In the meantime, enjoy your news satire website, people!

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The life of a party you most certainly aren't this weekend. Admitting to shooting the sherrif is not a good alibi......

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