UK News

Read story Brexiting News.
Politics 1

Boris Johnson today admitted, he stands firmly behind the implementation of a point-based immigration system, should the British...

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From NHS staff forced to become Premier League footballers for morale and fitness purposes
"Have you seen how well polished and clean those floors are...." - see story

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JEREMY CORBYN FORCEFULLY REMOVED FROM OFFICE.

Politics 3

A defiant Jeremy Corbyn had to be physically removed from the Labour headquarters after having his ass handed to him in a vote of confidence....

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Japanese start-up to sell used female gym bike seats

Health 7

Japanese start-up company Tentacle-Insertion-Company (TIC) has issued a press release today hailing their latest product: the used gym bicycle seat. Lucky members of a kickstarter project launched in early April are set to receive a guaranteed padded gym seat, sat and sweated on by the unmentionable female anatomy....

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80's Singer admits to lip-syncing

Entertainment 8

Popular British 80's Pop Singer Rick Astley who had hits such as Never gonna give you up, Together Forever and She wants to dance with me, has admitted in an interview that he didn't actually sing those songs and that he was actually lip-syncing. Speaking to Music Magazine, Mr. Astley had this to...

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NHS staff forced to become Premier League footballers for morale and fitness purposes

Health 1

NHS staff have today revealed that they've been ordered by senior bosses to join a Premier League football team. The news comes as an addendum to earlier news that the taking of Zumba classes would become a basic requirement of NHS employment....

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Ronnie Corbett dies; leaves body to nano-science

Entertainment 0

Ronnie Corbett, at last count approximately 3 foot 7 inches of fun and games, died yesterday after a short battle. Very short, if the stories are to be believed, though you mustn't believe everything you read in the papers. The funny man, who was probably best known for the part...

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Tax cheats set to dodge, duck, dip, dive and dodge, in new reality television dodgeball show

Business 10

Media-convicted UK tax dodgers are set to undergo a new form of trial this year as the criminal justice system tests a new form of crime prevention concept: reality TV dodgeball. In a brief statement released on Facebook by Judge MC Michaels, we have learned that any celebrity...

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Leicester win Premier League; Gary Lineker to appear nude on Match of the Day

Sport 2

Leicester City Football Club today celebrate winning the 2015/2016 Barclays Premier League title, with three games to spare. The Foxes concluded their season by drawing with Manchester United on Sunday night, and then watching as only rivals to the title,Tottenham Hotspur, could...

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EU demands Brit condoms 10% thicker to ensure less pleasure and fewer accidental children

Health 5

The EU, or European Union if we absolutely must use its full title, has today declared that Britain must ensure that its condoms are ten percent thicker than those sold elsewhere on the continent. Conspiracy theorists, and politicians running for various appointed positions,...

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More Spoof news and satire from Laughsend

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