Stories Archive by Month - August
The following satire and parody are past stories, displayed here for your browsing archive pleasure.
Bush Backs Investment Banker Bonus Bailout In Wake of Subprime Crisis
By Ion Zwitter, Avant News EditorNew York, December 7, 2007President George W. Bush called today for Congress to address a "growing crisis in investment banker bonuses" in the wake of the subprime
Hillary Clinton Names Monica Lewinsky Campaign Chairperson
Hillary Clinton named Monica Lewinsky her new campaign chriaperson in her bid for the Democratic Party nomination for President of the United States. Lewinsky, a former White House Intern and famous for her affair with
Houseguest Dies At Bush Senior's Summer Retreat
Kennebunkport, Maine - (Ass Mess): 'Absolutely nothing suspicious about it!' was the official line taken today as a houseguest at George Bush Senior's summer retreat in Kennebunkport died suddenly after hearing the news that young
Caddyshack's Bill Murray Arrested For Allegedly Driving, Possibly A Stolen, Golf Cart Drunk On The Way Back From A Disco In Stockholm
Stockholm, Sweden - Apparently reprising his beloved role as the emotionally challenged gardener obsessed with killing a renegade gopher in the original Caddyshack movie, Bill Murray was arrested by Stockholm police in the early morning
Michael Vick Receives Presidential Pardon
Atlanta, GA (UPSI) - The White House today announced that President Bush would be issuing a full presidential pardon to embattled Atlanta Falcons quarterback Michael Vick. The president met...
Metrowest Author Shows Vulnerable Side of Sexual Predators
On the heels of her excellent expose on the stress, anxiety, and depression that many illegal immigrants are forced to live with in this country, MetroWest Daily News staff writer Liz Mineo has scored...
Space Shuttle Replacement Craft Ready To Go
Pasadena, California (IP) - The Jet Propulsion Lab (JPL) announced today that it will replace the aging Shuttle fleet with giant frisbees. The Frisbees are old 1970's technology with a proven track record...
Bengals Have First-ever Maximum Security Training Camp
The felon-speckled lineup of the Cincinnati Bengals has somehow remained trouble-free for over two months...
Cancer horoscope
The next word you hear may cause you to rush into a blind rage. Please think before acting too rashly with a potato......
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