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What's on? Today, 26th June 2017
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Off airBreakfast newsIt's grim up northSurf's down, dudeI couldn't eat my dinner, but I would like some puddingExciting Fun with Poo BearI ate it all in one sittingYou know it's fresh when it cries on youLunchtime newsKiller bee robots from Eastern EuropeOld man and his cartCook with whatever's left in your fridgeThe odds aren't good but we still prevail every damned episodeI was proud of my designing skills 'til you came alongPlay me that record again, I might recognise the tuneTears of a ClownSlags n SlutsEvening newsLocal newsFriends who are fat don't let fat friends eat fatI want to be a celebrityWet wipes: a tale of woeNight newsArthur ChickenWould you like a latte with your 5 mile jog?Dance like yo legs is on fire!Hogwash
Off airWake up losersNormaMary RussoLoose menNot the whole pennyNews in the AfternoonAnd in the morning the rash should be goneThe street where you liveI just want my money, that's allAvery does crime & timeThe investigator did itHands-down pants-downNews close to youNews in the EveningAll this used to be fieldsPeople who live next doorYou carry a pink umbrella and you're not gay?If it moves - kill it, screw it or give it up for adoptionTorture and happinessSurely it's too late for news?!Unsaved documentYou got it stuck in there, you get it outArthur Chicken
Off airThe ThompsonsWhere grown men go to cry/masturbateYou can resell my kidney but never my liverI'd kill for a new homeThe only way to win is not to playBillie Newman is a complete shitThe amazing secretions of Patricia PottsThe bastards 'ate my gutsIf it doesn't squeal then it doesn't feel painSlug it out with sluggerUpload your life, bitches
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