06:00 |
Wake up losers
|
News / political programme |
|
06:00AM to 08:30AM.
Insulting breakfast show that tells the viewer to wake up and smell the coffee.
Jet fuel can't melt steal beams
View more details
|
08:30 |
Norma
|
Genital health show |
|
08:30AM to 09:00AM.
Classically trained chef Norma turns her hand to problem solving people's relationship issues and venereal diseases.
View more details
|
09:00 |
Lawks a lordy
|
Current / consumer affairs |
|
09:00AM to 10:00AM.
Topical show in which people try to outdo each other with pre-watershed insults.
View more details
|
10:00 |
Weekly MP bribe
|
Current / consumer affairs |
|
10:00AM to 10:30AM.
Examining the various bribes that have been given to MPs this week in order to maintain the status quo of rich people controlling everything.
View more details
|
10:30 |
Loose men
|
Current / consumer affairs |
|
10:30AM to 11:30AM.
Backslapping sexist pigs attempt to masquerade their show as relevant by occasionally discussing cancer.
View more details
|
11:30 |
Not the whole penny
|
Current / consumer affairs |
|
11:30AM to 12:30PM.
Business studies professor Mary Nixon investigates what happens to all those decimal parts of computed wage-slips that "get lost in the system somewhere". Interviews with the idiots behind Superman 3, and the geniuses behind Office Space.
View more details
|
12:30 |
News in the Afternoon
|
News / political programme |
|
12:30PM to 13:00PM.
Straight talking news show that doesn't shy away from showing you beheading videos.
View more details
|
13:00 |
And in the morning the rash should be gone
|
Soap |
|
13:00PM to 13:30PM.
It's always fun at the Doctors' - new drama series with Henry Key and Robert Key
Episode details:
Season 1, Ep. 1: Carl Lutz begins to think about the truth about gender.
View more details
|
13:30 |
The street where you live
|
Soap |
|
13:30PM to 14:00PM.
Truly award winning* soap based on a totally normal street near you.
*Not actually award winning
Episode details:
Season 1, Ep. 1: The proof of the pudding is in the eating. Three hundred and twenty two star wars figures died in the making of this episode. Matthew Crosby learns today what the hell it means when they say as hard as nails. Writers strikes definitely did not happen at this point in the series.
View more details
|
14:00 |
I just want my money, that's all
|
Auction show |
|
14:00PM to 15:00PM.
People stand around pretending to be interested while an old man wearing tweed tells them how much money their crap from the mantelpiece costs.
View more details
|
15:00 |
The investigator did it
|
Crime / Murder mystery Series |
|
15:00PM to 15:30PM.
Weekly escapades of naughty detective Guilt, attempting to solve crimes that he himself committed.
Episode details:
Season 1, Ep. 1: Will George discover the truth about what happens when not sickening? A new arrival comes to visit. Everyone forgets what happened recently. It really stands out, doesn't it?
Morally repugnant
View more details
|
15:30 |
Avery does crime & time
|
Crime / Murder mystery Series |
|
15:30PM to 16:30PM.
Denim jeans salesman Lisa Avery performs a misdeed and is jailed in this weekly drek.
Episode details:
Season 1, Ep. 1: In the future, folk will look back at this and cry? And that concludes something.
View more details
|
16:30 |
Hands-down pants-down
|
Quiz show |
|
16:30PM to 17:00PM.
Wacky quiz in which contestants must guess who is their partner by examining their genitals.
View more details
|
17:00 |
News close to you
|
News / political programme |
|
17:00PM to 17:30PM.
A summary of all the regional drama that happened outisde the shopping centre near where you live.
View more details
|
17:30 |
News in the Evening
|
News / political programme |
|
17:30PM to 19:00PM.
Hope you're back from your day job, because this is what we feed you when you're too tired to move or find the remote control.
View more details
|
19:00 |
All this used to be fields
|
Soap |
|
19:00PM to 19:30PM.
Sexy young couples, old people, and nothing in between, all fight and flooze together in one amazing farming community.
Episode details:
Season 1, Ep. 1: Guy reveals that Maynard is thinking naughty thoughts. Some ideas are meant to be rejected; some make it this far.
View more details
|
19:30 |
People who live next door
|
Soap |
|
19:30PM to 20:00PM.
Australian soap. Four hundred people dwell in a single street, presumably leading to a great deal of webbed-feet and confusion about which cousin is which.
Episode details:
Season 1, Ep. 1: Will Karin ever discover what Mary did that weekend when caught stroking someone else's beard? As the saying goes: let the buyer beware, and is warned that presenting neighbours with signed copies of their own photographs May not be the right answer.
View more details
|
20:00 |
You carry a pink umbrella and you're not gay?
|
Current / consumer affairs |
|
20:00PM to 20:30PM.
Series outing those who are clearly gay but not aware of it.
View more details
|
20:30 |
If it moves - kill it, screw it or give it up for adoption
|
Soap |
|
20:30PM to 21:00PM.
Award winning soap in which the worst possible people are presented in a totally believable way.
Episode details:
Season 1, Ep. 1: As someone uncovers the past, sheep uncover the secrets of the universe. It could happen to anyone, so why not?
View more details
|
21:00 |
It won't fit, it's too big!
|
Comedy Film |
|
21:00PM to 22:00PM.
Black short comedy about a man whose schlong is too large for his dwarf partner.
View more details
|
22:00 |
Surely it's too late for news?!
|
News / political programme |
|
22:00PM to 22:30PM.
It's never too late. Even though you've been following all the news throughout the day on your smartphone.
View more details
|
22:30 |
Killing in the name of Hyman Key
|
Historical / Period Drama Series |
|
22:30PM to 23:30PM.
A different fanatic group each week attempts to out-do believers in Hyman Key. Who will prevail?
Episode details:
Season 1, Ep. 1: Jesus strikes out today, just as everyone predicted, and decides to eat garlic to avoid sex.
View more details
|
23:30 |
Judge, Jury and Sexecutioner
|
Genital health show |
|
23:30PM to 00:30AM.
Porn stars choose whether, and how, to convict real-life felons.
View more details
|
00:30 |
I love your snozz
|
Romance Film |
|
00:30AM to 02:00AM.
Joan Odom has a rather large appendage in this romantic comedy.
View more details
|