Science & Technology

Read story Facebook to no longer store any data about its users
World Entertainment 3

Facebook will no longer store any user data, according to the latest in a series of leaked documents from the technology company.

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Notable quotable from this story

From Facebook to no longer store any data about its users
"Or, for your Linux chappies, rm -rf...." - see story

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Microsoft to launch new Scorpio 4K Xbox; no plans for any games to be able to use capability during lifecycle

US News 7

Microsoft have this week released plans to produce and release a 4k capable Xbox in 2017, code-named Scorpio. Though the machine is said to be an upgrade of the current generation Xbox One, and thus with an expected lifecycle of approximately 3 to 4 further years, Microsoft offi...

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Sound Guy Discovers Turning Everything Up On Equaliser Makes Music Sound Perfect

UK News 3

Tom Falconer, a sound guy for the St David's Church band in Maidenhead, has claimed to have discovered the perfect universal equalisation formula for mixing music according to independent audiophile magazine 'Acoustink'. The technique however is simply to just "turn all the knob...

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Craig Wright found to be creator of ancient bartering system

World Entertainment 4

The BBC, Guardian and NBC have today received definitive proof from Craig Wright that shows him to have been the originator of the first ever barter systems. Though many have suggested that the claims may be somewhat spurious, Wright has provided undeniable digital proofs of...

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Paul Simon's name changed to Simon Paul after government database confuses forename and surname

US News Entertainment 3

Paul Simon is currently having to fight government officials for the right to use his real name. A recent passport application went awry as the government's database decided to invert his forename and surname, presumably in an automated cock-up that truly up-cocked his given...

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Heck Yeah, America: Immortality Achievement Unlocked

US News Health 0

An earth-shattering breakthrough in the scientific community is changing the way Americans live. CapitalismTech, the California-based global leader of healthcare technology, discovered the medical key to immortality early last week. Chief of Development and Technology Cronk Trun...

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Someone whose name might be Steven Avery arrested for public pigeon fancying

US News Health 1

A Wisconsin man has been arrested today on charges of public indecency with regards to "pigeon fancying". The accused, whose name has not been Avery disclosed to the media, is already serving a prison sentence, but this has not prevented local law enforcement from charging him...

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86% of #monday #motivation tweets cause Twitter users to feel bad about themselves

World Health 5

Scientists and statisticians at Laughingstate University, Colorado, have today revealed findings of a three month study concerning the trending topic of #mondaymotivation stories appearing on Twitter. The 140 character long missives usually contain material promoting the user's...

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Experts Swipe at Smart-phones

World Health 2

An international team of experts now warns that excessive use of Smart-phones are forever changing our physiology. There’s nothing new in this though. It is a well-established fact that cultural advancements and trends, if significant enough, can force the human body into a sp...

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More Spoof news and satire from Laughsend

TRUMP IS BALD! Read story TRUMP IS BALD! Teacher crisis! "Our children aren't getting no education!" claims Minister for Education. Read story Teacher crisis! "Our children aren't getting no education!" claims Minister for Education. Donald Trump's $5.7bn Wall Fund game show - Where's My Wig? Read story Donald Trump's $5.7bn Wall Fund game show - Where's My Wig? Medical breakthrough! Surgeons claim world first by transplanting common sense into Donald Trump! Read story Medical breakthrough! Surgeons claim world first by transplanting common sense into Donald Trump! English faculty member fired for telling English-speaking students to "Speak English". Read story English faculty member fired for telling English-speaking students to "Speak English". Amanda Nunes following shocking first round knockout of Cris Cyborg at UFC 232: This is a victory for all lesbians Read story Amanda Nunes following shocking first round knockout of Cris Cyborg at UFC 232: This is a victory for all lesbians

Science and technology news is probably the headline section that we most enjoy writing for here at Laughsend. There's such an amazing array of funny things to write about, from hi-tech gadgets to Yahweh being found in a taco - two of our best parody writers have an IT background, and fight (scissors/paper/stone) for the right to write our technology articles, because they love their computers and gadgets so much. The other writer just likes to laugh at them while duelling, and in the background just write funny news stories about cool things like dinosaur's fridges, DNA that can make an inside-out you, and magnets - because they're so neat!

Given Time, by Paul London

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