Chav Scottish Wedding of the Year!

I've received this one a few times - alternately title as "Chav Wedding of the Year" or "Scottish Wedding of the Year". I feel really mean posting it, if it's real, because these people probably don't deserve internet mockery, no matter how funny they might appear, they've probably not done anything to deserve it. However, I have a feeling that all is not as it seems and this might actual be a fake wedding ensemble. This one's spread over 8 pages of visual goodness.

Chav Scottish Wedding - Page 1/8


I would like to share with you one of the worst experiences of my life. As you
know, I don't like weddings, and usually with good reason. There now follows
the reason why I don't like weddings.
I was asked to play the organ at this wedding at the weekend, and these are
the results.
Good Lord.

Chav wedding photo

So here you will see the motley collection of Groom, Best Man and other
assorted males. The one sporting the red shirt and trainers is the Groom.
I think some confusion must have ensued as to what the dress code actually
was. Some red ties, some black, and one with no tie whatsoever.
I also thought the choice of location for the photographs was also quite
astonishing. Opposite the church was a row of garages, and it appeared to be
the most suitable backdrop, presumably to prevent any upstaging of the men
here pictured.
And so, as if couldn't get any worse, the bride arrived...

Chav Scottish Wedding - Page 2/8


red wedding chav dress

Not everyone can pull off such a vibrant red, but here I think they mange it
quite well.
Now in my experience there is usually a bride, a couple of thin bridesmaids
and one great wopping one on the end. But in this case the fat bridesmaid has
become the bride.
Alarm bells, should, incidentally, be ringing around now. If they aren't they will
be soon.

Chav Scottish Wedding - Page 3/8


happy chav couple photo

Deciding that the backdrop may actually improve the picture, the happy
couple strolled into an adjoining field for this wonderful picture.

Chav Scottish Wedding - Page 4/8


fat chav breast photo

It was noted during the exposure of this wonderfully composed image that the
groom's head was roughly the same size as her left breast, and probably
contained a similar sort of substance.

Chav Scottish Wedding - Page 5/8


fat knee chav picture

This is one of my favourites. What is she showing us here? A severe case of
knee gout? Whatever it is she is doing, the husband is in even more fine fettle
(thanks to the showing of the ankle) than certainly I thought was possible.

Chav Scottish Wedding - Page 6/8


mentally diseased chav

Mentally disabled is probably the term best used here. Or fat pig and ugly little
weasel. I'm sure they have the same effect.

Chav Scottish Wedding - Page 7/8


get it up chav

"Here, let me help you up..."

Chav Scottish Wedding - Page 8/8




Our good-looking groom is apparently reaching for something and having
trouble locating it. Perhaps a forklift truck might help raise the blockage?
I think this proves to us all that there is someone out there for all of us.
Let's just hope they don't breed.


These jokes are all in the public domain. Please Respect Copyright Laws.

Given Time, by Paul London

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