Aries
Birth date: 21 March - 19 April
Love should be grasped like a nettle and embraced like a bulldog, never let love out of your sight or you'll have to endure its never ending damnation.
Love is a wonderful thing that can truly change your life for the better. However, the chances of this happening to you anytime before lunch tomorrow are so remote that you might as well quit pretending that you're well liked, go home and eat ice-cream until your brain freezes.
Your future may well rely on the kindness of others and your ability to fight your way to the front of a queue.
The best things in life are free, including back massages and sex. However, since it is possible to pay for these things one wonders this week whether they ought to be tried that way, too.
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