Romantic Virgo love horoscope

Drinking alcohol may well turn today into the worst tomorrow possible. Try to ensure that you go out tonight wearing the underwear with the really strong elastic.

Long walks, cold showers and playing with the puppies. All these will soon be a distant memory this week after a tragic accident after which you will be confined to a comfy chair and be only able to drink your food.

To say that love is dumb is just acknowledging the fact that love hasn't affected you in the way you need it to. You do have romance in your heart but it needs to be released. Relax all your muscles, perhaps excluding any sphincters, and then tense them all again. Then relax again. Now go get 'em!