Stories Archive by Month - January

Footballer Kaka IS leaving Real Madrid. Contrary to reports about his £100 million transfer to Manchester City Football Club with a half a million quid a week salary, we can exclusively reveal that he is

In an obviously scripted opening to his Friday evening TV show, evil entertainer Jonathan Ross apologised in detail for his appalling speech impediment. "It is incumbent on all of us in this industry to

London - (Russ/Ross Mess): Comic TV actor Andrew Sachs has disinherited granddaughter Georgina 'Satanic Sluts' Baillie for subjecting the family to the lurid Russell Brand shagging farce. Baillie's Daily Screws intimate blow-by-blow revelations "...

You are saddened when you realize you can't jump to work and back...

Israeli security operatives refused to confirm or deny rumours that an undercover operation had been successfully carried out in a combined operation between Mossad agents and Israeli Special Forces. It is claimed the covert operatives

Chandler, Texas - (X-Files Mess): "Total crap!" is how Henderson County Sheriff Ray Nutt (sic? no kidding!) described reports of UFO gamma ray burst activity above the Houston morgue from where the body of Waco

Having recently crashed his Ferrari into the wall of a tunnel close to Manchester Airport, Cristiano Ronaldo has confessed exactly what he was up to on the night of the crash. "I see on You Tube,

WASHINGTON D.C. Using a series of Executive orders, President Barack Obama has renamed the Drug Enforcement Agency (DEA) and fundamentally changed its mission. The new organization will be known as the Radio Enforcement Agency and