Russell Carney

The wonderful Russell Carney was born at breakfast time in 1982, to beautifully coloured parents Anthony and Mary Carney. Russell hopes to shortly accept roles being a secretary.

In 1998, Russell was first hired, while working the streets, by producer Sarah Key, who is one short DNA step away from being a mystery online shopper. Although four prongs short of a fork, Russell, originally born a different gender, has found himself one of the most sought after individuals in the country.


Best known for:

  • Nothing at all. Sad, really.

Currently starring in:

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Tomatoes can be your best friend - go Red for the day. * This horoscope is not sponsored by Heinz, or the Communist......

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