Porter Schmitt

On 4th July, 2019, Porter was first hired, while working the streets, by little known agent Ed Shea, while holding down another job as a dog owner. Lost and lonely, Porter is said to be "radiant" with hope.

Porter hopes to shortly accept roles pertaining to being a surly bus driver and a lawyer.

Porter Schmitt was conceived in the family barn in Croydon, to comely parents William and Violet Schmitt. Porter spent the first few years of his career suffering from elbow rot.


Best known for:

  • Nothing at all. Sad, really.

Currently starring in:

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Aquarius horoscope

Breaking out of your shell is best done sooner than later. The way you feel is not necessary limited to what you eat......

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