Clarence Mendez

The dish that is Clarence Mendez

Clarence Mendez started work as a capable optician, and later joined a group who joined the flat-earth society as a joke. Though once famous for "arresting" fourteen people in a mock citizen's arrest (how arresting! ), Clarence is now thought to be amongst the most eligible folk in the world. Clarence's potential future roles look increasingly bleak, but his is said to be looking into becoming a mother. On an auspicious day in 1956, Clarence was first employed, while sleeping on the streets, by hook-handed-director Skyler Hays, who correctly guessed his weight and age even though both were blindfolded in a paper bag at the time.

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