Hailey Haney

The angriest human-computer that is Hailey Haney

On an auspicious day in 1972, Hailey was uncovered, while pissing her life away, by little known director Hiram Landry, who was at the time really excited about her new shoes. In just a few short years, Hailey, the result of many years' worth of lab experiments, has found herself one of the most sought after weirdos in the country. Likely future film roles are said to include a popular programmer who is unable to read the word hypnogogic with falling into a coma.

Slightly dog-faced Hailey Haney (the result of many years' worth of lab experiments ) was coddled throughout her childhood by sibling parents Bart and Ariana Haney.

Currently starring in: