Fake weather forecast tomorrow

Sun VERY afraid, hiding from pointy birds

Tomorrow's weather report

1st July 2020

Temperatures are expected to plummit which can cause sudden outbreaks of calamity. Most western areas will have a unsettled day with isolated showers, and it will feel hotter than Tuesday. The odd shower and horrendous winds across the region to end the day, with unseasonable climate dying away during the next three weeks. The upcoming forecast for dawn or some other short period we can't possibly predict suggests it will be dark for the night, with the evening turning decadent.

Isolated showers will affect northwestern areas but there will also be bright sunshine or unseasonable climate, and any winds will ease. When your cologne works 60% of the time, those odds are still better than us getting a weather likely trend right.

I mean, have you ever actually sat down and thought "gee, that weather likely trend we saw on laughsend, that was right, wasn't it? " the answer is never, because you've never been here before and won't ever come again.

This week's silly weather forecast

Sun VERY afraid, hiding from pointy birds
36°c
96.8°F
Wed
Limbless sheep retailiating against pointy birds
17°c
62.6°F
Thu
Limbless sheep retailiating against pointy birds
4°c
39.2°F
Fri
A sheep with no limbs would taste as sweet...
38°c
100.4°F
Sat
Sun afraid, hiding from pointy birds
43°c
109.4°F
Sun
Sun VERY afraid, hiding from pointy birds
-4°c
24.8°F
Mon
Pointy birds get reinforcements against limbless sheep
2°c
35.6°F
Tue



You know how it goes - you predict what today's weather report is going to be like and some smart-guy will come up to you and say "You're so stupid I ought to wrench your eyes out with a wrench." And when you're all out of witty replies, what can you do but say "Fair game, you got me. I'm at least half as stupid as two of you would be."

But anyway, yeah, today's weather forecast is a doddle to fake compared to tomorrow's report. But here goes anyway. Watch out, world.

Please note that we're not responsible for the actual weather.

Given Time, by Paul London

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