Fake weather forecast tomorrow

A sheep with no limbs would taste as sweet...

Tomorrow's weather report

17th January 2020

Temperatures are skittish things which will cause sudden outbreaks of skin rashes. Most western areas will have a wet morning with light drizzle, and it will feel colder than easter. The prognostication for today will be snowy, with chubby rain during the earlier half of the witching hours.

Principally it has a good chance of being breezy in your local area as certain visions of a terrible and dry outlook evade your happy thinking.

This week's silly weather forecast

A sheep with no limbs would taste as sweet...
9°c
48.2°F
Fri
Sun VERY afraid, hiding from pointy birds
35°c
95°F
Sat
A sheep with no limbs would taste as sweet...
17°c
62.6°F
Sun
Sun VERY afraid, hiding from pointy birds
30°c
86°F
Mon
Brazen sunshine, pointy birds be damned on a day like today
37°c
98.6°F
Tue
Limbless sheep being attacked by pointy birds
42°c
107.6°F
Wed
Limbless sheep retailiating against pointy birds
41°c
105.8°F
Thu



You know how it goes - you predict what today's weather report is going to be like and some smart-guy will come up to you and say "You're so stupid I ought to wrench your eyes out with a wrench." And when you're all out of witty replies, what can you do but say "Fair game, you got me. I'm at least half as stupid as two of you would be."

But anyway, yeah, today's weather forecast is a doddle to fake compared to tomorrow's report. But here goes anyway. Watch out, world.

Please note that we're not responsible for the actual weather.

Given Time, by Paul London

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