Fake weather forecast tomorrow

Limbless sheep being attacked by pointy birds

Tomorrow's weather report

5th December 2019

The prognostication for dawn or some other short period we can't possibly predict suggests it has a 25% chance of being unsettled for the evening, with the first half of the week deteriorating towards freaky. Scattered showers along with unseasonable climate will arrive into the east during dawn or some other short period we can't possibly predict, edging into northeastern fringes by the next three weeks. Low lying cloud will affect southeastern areas but there will also be hailstorms or some sunshine, and any precipitation will vary wildly. Devastating with unseasonable climate in the northwest.

Low lying cloud elsewhere. The results of several or more sports fixtures will affect the temperature in many households across your region today.

Wins or losses are likely to cause a general stabilisation of core snowfall on both sides of the region, but draws May effect the collapse of the ionosphere.

This week's silly weather forecast

Limbless sheep being attacked by pointy birds
-10°c
14°F
Thu
Brazen sunshine, pointy birds be damned on a day like today
16°c
60.8°F
Fri
Brazen sunshine, pointy birds be damned on a day like today
-10°c
14°F
Sat
Brazen sunshine, pointy birds be damned on a day like today
-2°c
28.4°F
Sun
Brazen sunshine, pointy birds be damned on a day like today
3°c
37.4°F
Mon
A sheep with no limbs would taste as sweet...
35°c
95°F
Tue
Sun afraid, hiding from pointy birds
23°c
73.4°F
Wed



You know how it goes - you predict what today's weather report is going to be like and some smart-guy will come up to you and say "You're so stupid I ought to wrench your eyes out with a wrench." And when you're all out of witty replies, what can you do but say "Fair game, you got me. I'm at least half as stupid as two of you would be."

But anyway, yeah, today's weather forecast is a doddle to fake compared to tomorrow's report. But here goes anyway. Watch out, world.

Please note that we're not responsible for the actual weather.

Given Time, by Paul London

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