Satire story: The Secret To Getting Government Contracts Is Being Disadvantaged Small Business/woman Owner/disabled Veteran/minority

My research into lucrative government contracts made me realize one major point: Fortunate white guys don't stand a chance. You must fit the criteria of the headline to even be The Secret To Getting Government Contracts Is Being Disadvantaged Small Business/woman Owner/disabled Veteran/minoritySatire about

Scorpio horoscope

For what it's worth, today is going to be very short. Which is a very good thing for you. Danger, excitement, thrills....