Satire story: Twilight Star Signed For Eclipse, May Not Return For #4

Taylor Lautner says that he has other things on his mind (translation: Taylor Swift) and may not return to do his role on the fourth Twilight movie but that he had already signed to do Twilight Star Signed For Eclipse, May Not Return For #4Satire about

Aries horoscope

All for which you have fought will be lost if you cannot control your wang. Wise words which may be applicable. Tailors......