Your free, funny Capricorn horoscope for today

Astrological sign for Capricorn


Birth date: 22 December - 19 January

Your capricorn horoscope is a daily reminder of how wonderful you are, but also (we hope) capable of cheering you up when you're a bit down.

Combovers will suddenly attract you this week as you attempt to get a hospital appointment for an eye problem. Although your subtle forms of persuasion have worked well in the past, your partner may start to get tired of your spontaneous stripping to initiate sex.

The sun doesn't wear a hat, and it's probably not a good idea to play with it.

Your stupidity today will be rivalled only by your embarrassment.

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