Your free, funny Taurus horoscope for today

Astrological sign for Taurus

Taurus

Birth date: 20 April - 20 May

Have fun with your Taurus daily horoscope, filled with astrology and... zodiac. And psychic things, too, about you and every other member of your zodiacal tribe.

Monkeys may go nuts for bananas, but Nutters don't give a monkeys about going bananas. This may be important for you to remember. Pah! Happiness? The Gods know not of this word and you will pay for your insubordination.

In all my time I've never had anyone like you reading my horoscopes - you are bedevilled, a hustler of reputation. You are not wanted here.

Art is always something you've admired from a distance, but today you may choose to embrace your pinker side.

Given Time, by Paul London Given Time, by Paul London

Get Daily Taurus Horoscopes in your Inbox

Get your daily horoscope newsletter

More from Laughsend

Tourism booming in Venezuela: A Laughsend Special Report   Punny History  

Looking for more funny star sign related laughs?

Our most popular funny stories




Interested to know if Yesterday's Horoscope was correct?

Funny stuff

Get our daily horoscope newsletter straight to your inbox
Subscribe to funny horoscope newsletter
... AND CLICK
or Find out more first

Consider checking us out and following us on social media:

More from Laughsend

Tourism booming in Venezuela: A Laughsend Special Report   Punny History  
Write a funny story here
Free sign up / Login
Funny newsletter Funny RSS feed