There's this quite major company called Time Computers over here in England. I bought a system from them, and then five months later I hear a "Pfoo!" noise, and my display went all fuzzy and strange. After some troubleshooting, I opened up the case and discovered that the video card had a little, remarkably Wile E. Coyote-esque soot explosion mark centered around a burnt chip in the middle of it.
Here's the conversation I had with tech support about it, with a lot cut out: "What seems to be the problem, sir?"
Me: "Well, my screens all fuzzy, and my video card seems to have exploded."
Tech Support: "Well, right click on the desktop."
Me: "Before you say anything, I've tried the monitor on another computer, and on this computer on Windows Linux, and BeOS, and it's definitely something wrong with the video card, because the monitor worked on the other computers, and it didn't work in any of the operating systems in this one, and when I tried another video card, it worked."
Tech Support: "Right click on the desktop."
Me: "..."
Tech Support: "Right click on the desktop."
Me: "Well, I'm in Linux right now."
Tech Support: "Right click on the desktop."
Me: "I'm not in Windows."
Tech Support: "Right click on the desktop."
Me: "Do you know what an operating system is?"
Tech Support: "Yes, sir."
Me: "Ok then, because, I'm not in Windows. I'm in Linux, which is another operating system. Right clicking on the desktop won't do anything you think it will, I promise. Do you want me to reboot into Windows?"
Tech Support: "Right click on the desktop please, sir."
I sighed, gave up, rebooted into Windows, and right clicked on the desktop. Me: "Do you want me to click on Properties"
Tech Support: "No sir, please click on Properties"
Me: "..."
After a while, "we" determined that, no, it isn't my resolution, and installing new drivers won't help. After a very long discussion, I learned that to replace my video card, they would "have to" (or so policy dictates) take the entire computer away (monitor and all) for business days to replace the faulty video card. I protested this, because the computer was being used in a business. They told me there was "nothing they could do."
This seemed bad enough, but then: "Have you backed up recently?"
Me: "No, why?"
Tech Support: "You should..."
Me: "Sure, ok, I'll remember."
Tech Support: "...because as part of our policy, when servicing a computer, we delete everything on the hard disk."
Me: "What the WHY???"
Tech Support: "Company policy."
Me: "But it's a broken video card! Even you admit that!!! It has nothing to do with the hard drive!"
Tech Support: "That's company policy, sir."
After about an hour of arguing, we didn't get anywhere. I am living with the video card up to this day, months later, and was not refunded in anyway.
Turns out to be rather more tragic than funny, actually.
Copyright © 2025