What They Say, Versus What They Really Mean

A number of different approaches are being tried. (We are still guessing at this point.)
Major technological breakthrough! (It works OK, but looks very hi-tech.)
Test results were extremely gratifying! (Unbelievable! It actually worked.)
The entire concept will have to be abandoned. (The only person who understood the thing quit.)
All new. (Parts are not interchangeable with previous design.)
No maintenance. (Impossible to fix)
Low maintenance. (Nearly impossible to fix)
E-mail me (or fax me) the data. (I'm too lazy to write it down.)

These jokes are all in the public domain. Please Respect Copyright Laws.

Virgo horoscope

Three is the magic number because some people have a magic superfluous nipple which can change the colour of the sky....