Stories Archive by Month - January
The following satire and parody are past stories, displayed here for your browsing archive pleasure.
Super Bowl Xliii To Feature Real-time Biometric Player Data
By Ion Zwitter, Avant News EditorBurbank, California, January 30, 2009For the first time in Super Bowl history, Sunday's Super Bowl XLIII will feature a remarkable collection of live, real-time data on
Ex-yankees' Manager Joe Torre's Revealing Book
LOS ANGELES, California - Joe Torre, the ex-manager of 'The Boys in Pinstripes,' the New York Yankees has written an expose on his old team.
The book which will come out Feb. 3 is entitled, 'My
Overwhelming Evidence of Guilt Constitutes Unfair Trial, Blagojevich Lawyers Say
Having failed to garner public support, the governor's legal team now intends to argue that in the absence of witnesses that can refute government evidence of corruption, and with no allies willing to perjure themselves
Hull City And Millwall Fans To Protest Against 'Modern Game'
After last weekend's scenes of terrifying mindless violence and seat-throwing at the FA Cup fourth round tie between Hull City and Millwall, 'men' associated with both clubs have this morning announced that they are to
Woman Charged With Racism In Letter Box Row
A 68 year old Kent woman was arrested and charged with racism yesterday when the owner of a second hand junk shop called Police after she refused to believe that the post office letter box
Obama In Secret $30 Million Deal With Blackberry
As many Americans have already suspected, President Barack Obama allegedly inked a $30 million advertising deal with smartphone maker Blackberry, Inc.
Obama Confirmed For Glastonbury
Michael Eavis, founder of the Glastonbury festival, has managed to pull off another amazing booking for the Glastonbury headliner as recently inagurated President Barack Obama was confirmed as playing the 2009 concert.
A number of people
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Bask in the glory of your achievements today. A flurry of exclamation marks will come back to haunt you later this......
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