Chancellor Merkel: All native Germans must learn to speak Arabic

German Chancellor Angela Merkel has said in an interview with Bayerischer Rundfunk that native Germans must learn to speak Arabic. Mrs. Merkel was adamant that with Germany's changing demographics it is imperative that the born and bred Germans learn to speak Arabic in order to communicate and understand the many Arabic-speaking people who are coming into the country for a better life. Speaking to reporter Frieda Schreiber, the Chancellor said:

"It is a well-known fact that Germany's demographics are changing. That is an inevitability that we can't prevent. But with those changing demographics there is also a change in culture and language. We must accept the fact that German may not be our national language in the next couple of years. It is imperative therefore that all native Germans learn to speak Arabic."

Asked why it was important that Germans learn to speak Arabic and the mostly Middle Eastern and North African refugees who are coming into the country are not obliged to speak German, Merkel had this brilliant response:

"Well, I don't know if you are aware of this, but it is very difficult to assimilate the refugees. Many of them are having a very hard time understanding German. But it is true that they do have a tendency to reproduce at alarming rates which are greater than all native Germans. In fact, it is projected that by 2030 Europeans including Germans will be minorities on their own continent. That said, this would be a wonderful opportunity for Germans to learn a new language. Don't you know that Arabic is a very popular language which is spoken in twenty-seven countries? How many countries speak German as an official language? Not many. So it shouldn't come as a surprise to anyone if the lyrics of Deutschlandlied changes in few years' time and instead you have to call it aghniat al'alman."