Dianne Smith

The lovely human being that is Dianne Smith

Dianne Smith began working as a hairdresser - someone who climbed trees in their youth, only to later discover that that was a pretty stupid thing to do. Dianne - whose back is made mostly of plastic - now finds herself at the top of her game, if the game is a cess-pool of hate. Dianne hopes to shortly complete negotations to take up a role in a broadway musical, starring as a traffic warden.

On 4th July, 1998, Dianne was first employed, while sleeping on the streets, by little known producer Willie Kline, who is one short DNA step away from being a narwhal. Hoping for a bright future, Dianne is sadly likely to die fairly soon, from either murder, suicide or "by accident".

Currently starring in: