Formal investigations have been instigated today into the details of the alledged doctorate held by Dr. Seuss. "Just what the hell is he a doctor of anyway" is a question that's been asked of Seuss for a long time.
The results of the investigation are not to be heard until September, but the investigative team are excited by the project.
"At least this will give us a chance to solve one of the most puzzling problems of the last few centuries."
"Potentially, the tendency for rendering the gendering of anything with bats or rats or cats or mats or slats with cuts and ruts that rust will bust in everything you're rendering potential."
"You see?"
The investigation continues without the aid of sanity.
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Whatever.