A new planet, dubbed Mega Earth by its discoverer, has been identified orbiting around a giant star approximately 4.65 light years from Earth. News of the discovery was broken by scientists from Laughingscale University in Colorado, but the discoverer itself had remained anonymous until today, and we can exclusively reveal that the planet was found by Japanese creation Godzilla.
"'Rawwwr, rarrrrrrr, oooohrawwwr' was what Godzilla first said, and to be honest, to our eternal embarrassment we ignored him," said Marshall Law, curator of Gozira Studies at the university. "But when we looked into what he was talking about, he'd discovered this amazing planet, and frankly we were all so amazed we let him have the day off. He took to rampaging, but that's in the world news, not science & tech."
This is not the first discoverer made by Godzilla - in 1987 he discovered the 18 uses of dragon's blood, and in 1996 was one of the first to read and rate The Twilight novels on Amazon.
"Godzilla is one of those truly extraordinary beasts," Law continued. "He constantly amazes us with his versatillity. You show him a rorschach and he'll give you a response so insightful you'll applaud until your palms are sore."
Godzilla is currently on maternity leave, and has refused all attempts at contact.
Comments
I want a feeling I'm not the true audience for this. I've genuinely liked the articles and comments on laughsend, but it's all much of a muchness now.
I love this. Hey - this is beautiful. Do not listen to the miserable people.
I AM ENTIRELY PLUSSED BY THIS ARTICLE. IF I HAD THE OPPORTUNITY TO STEP INTO YOUR SHOES... I'D HAVE TO THINK ABOUT IT.
If I fall asleep at any time, you'll have to.