World Politics Sport

Bizarre reasons "experts" have given for certain National Football teams' failure to qualify for the 2018 World Cup

story image about 2018 World and bizarre
Report story

By the time most people read this, the 2018 World Cup qualifiers would have concluded and all eligible thirty-two teams would have already booked their spot at football's premier quadrennial event. That said, there were some shocking results in the qualifiers. The failures of CONCACAF powerhouse the USA, three-time runner-up the Netherlands and four-time champions Italy are still reverberating throughout the footballing world and it is anticipated that the respective national football associations of those countries would go all out to put things in place to make sure that there is no repeat of such debacles. That said, many so-called "experts" who are not even sports analysts or reporters have their own opinions as to why those teams failed so miserably in the qualifiers. This was what they had to say.

Jose Gutierrez, Founder of the Group Illegals are Real Americans:

"Well of course the failure of the USA to qualify for the World Cup is not surprising to me. And it is also no shocker that their defining loss should come against a small team like Trinidad & Tobago which is comprised of only black players. This is symbolic of the USA's and ultimately the gringos' days of dominance soon coming to an end. While it could be argued that there were also black players on the USA team, it was mostly gringos which comprised the team. Is it just coincidence that the USA's failure to qualify for the World Cup should come just a year after they elected one of the most evil gringos the world has ever seen in Donald Trump who has said some of the most racist things about Mexicans? I think not."

Richard de Jong, Dutch Chauvinist, Politician and founder of the Pro-male Party of the Netherlands:

"It looks like all the years of the feminization of Dutch society has finally come back to haunt us. Just imagine in this country we have a bridge named after Dafne Schippers but nothing named after Euro '88 hero Marco van Basten. When our women won the Euro back in the summer many so-called "experts" said that our men's footballers can learn a thing or two from them. Really? It's no wonder that they couldn't get the required results they needed to qualify for the World Cup after that. They felt so emasculated."

Luigi di Moretti, Leader of the Italian Nationalist Party:

"This is what happens when you allow foreign-born and non-Italian players to be part of the national team. Just look at history. All Italian teams which have won World Cups in the past have featured only players born in Italy of Italian parentage and who look Italian. History also shows that having players on the national team who don't look Italian only proves detrimental to us. What did Mario Balotelli do for us in the last World Cup? Nothing. So is it any surprise that having a Brazilian-born player in the starting lineup ultimately led to our failure to qualify for Russia next year?"

Get Weekly Funny Stuff in your Inbox

Subscribe to our weekly newsletter



Headlines like this

thumbnail for item A generic football badge

Chelsea FC to be sold as drug for narcolepsy

UK News Sport 0

English Premier League football club Chelsea FC are said to be considering bottling their particular brand of recent football as a drug, to ensure long and trouble free sleeping....

read more
4 years ago
thumbnail for item David Moyes Gout Plane Banner

Moyes gout

World Sport 0

Manchester United boss David Moyes has today been revealed to be suffering from gout. The revelation came via an unusual means: a banner, flown from the back of a plane, displaying...

read more
4 years ago

Comments

#1 @ 1 month ago
by MEERKATLUNCH - Ghost

People win awards for all sorts of things. Not relevant right now, but good information to have, I feel. I don't know what to say. But whatever - it would be witty, and clever, and ... no, your right, it wouldn't be.

7 comments, registered 3 years ago
#2 @ 1 month ago
by ram sardine13 - Ghost

MEERKATLUNCH wrote

People win awards for all sorts of things. Not relevant right now, but good information to have, I feel. I don't know what to say. But whatever - it would be witty, and clever, and ... no, your right, it wouldn't be.

i have a feeling i'm not the true audience for this. i just don't get it.

:)

7 comments, registered 2 years ago
#3 @ 1 month ago
by MatchShop - Ghost

Nice work, funny type person.

4 comments, registered 2 years ago
#4 @ 1 month ago
by James H - Writer

MatchShop wrote

Nice work, funny type person.

There is sum sublie stuff that want made me wet my area's, but this is totally droll.

4 comments, registered 2 years ago
#5 @ 1 month ago
by RMacdonald1986 - Ghost

meh with meh on top.

8 comments, registered 3 years ago
#6 @ 1 month ago
by questionlearning - One-off wonder

asphaltcowboy wrote

MatchShop wrote

Nice work, funny type person.

There is sum sublie stuff that want made me wet my area's, but this is totally droll.

Edited: sorry, spurious post! :)

1 comment, registered 2 years ago

To add a comment you must first sign up and login.

Funny stuff

Get our funny weekly newsletters straight to your inbox
Subscribe to funny newsletter
... AND CLICK
or Find out more first

Consider checking us out and following us on social media:


Scorpio horoscope

If you never liked sprouts before, try them again. Your tastes may have changed. Other people are not as crazy as......

Full horoscope

More from Laughsend

Germany to cancel open air Christmas markets   "Controversial" Family Feud question and answer spark social media outrage  
Write and publish your own funny stories
Free sign up / Login
Funny newsletter Funny RSS feed