World Sport

Paige Van Zant to quit MMA for modeling career

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UFC fighter Paige Van Zant is to quit Mixed Martial Arts for a modeling career. In an interview with Fight Magazine, the former contestant on a celebrity edition of Food Network’s Chopped said:

“I was approached by a photographer for a popular men’s magazine and I was told that I had the right look and body type that they wanted. I was initially taken aback because I never really considered myself sexy or anything. I just like to stay fit and healthy. That’s why I took up Mixed Martial Arts. But after getting my ass beaten to a pulp by Rose who almost choked me to death in the Octagon at UFC Fight Night 80 in December 2015 and who left my face a bloody mess and Michelle Waterson who also almost strangled me to death at UFC on FOX 22, albeit minus spilling my blood, it then dawned upon me that my place is not in the Octagon. Can you imagine what may happen to me if I have to face the current Women's Strawweight Champion Joanna anytime in the near future?”

Van Zant continued:

“I saw the YouTube video of when she beat Jessica and busted up her nose at UFC Fight Night 69 and I have to admit that I almost pissed my panties. That Polish girl is scary as hell. And after giving it some thought I said to myself that maybe the photographer's offer isn’t that bad. So after a few minutes of deliberating I decided to take up the offer.”

She went on:

“I gave him my number and he called me later that day to finalize the terms of my contract. It will be a four-year contract worth five million dollars and there is the possibility that the contract will be renewed. This is absolutely great news for me because it is definitely much more than I would probably make in the Octagon and the best thing is that I don’t have to worry about spending all of it in hospital bills.”





The funny news item you've just read is FICTITIOUS. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental or is intended purely as a satire, parody or spoof.

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11 years ago

Comments

#1 @ 8 years ago
by RexBolton64 - Ghost

ABSOLUTELY SPOT ON.

:-(

5 comments, registered 11 years ago
#2 @ 8 years ago
by ABARAJAS7 - Ghost

RexBolton64 wrote

ABSOLUTELY SPOT ON.

:-(

Oh shut up. :)

9 comments, registered 11 years ago
#3 @ 8 years ago
by pony_harmony123 - Ghost

ABARAJAS7 wrote

RexBolton64 wrote

ABSOLUTELY SPOT ON.

:-(

Oh shut up. :)

and your point is? i just don't get it.

3 comments, registered 11 years ago
#4 @ 8 years ago
by record-plot - One-off wonder

ABARAJAS7 wrote

RexBolton64 wrote

ABSOLUTELY SPOT ON.

:-(

Oh shut up. :)

Why doe's this not seem to bother anyone else? I don't think this is an appropriate subject for mocking.

1 comment, registered 8 years ago
#5 @ 8 years ago
by Merlin_Farrell123 - Ghost

record-plot wrote

ABARAJAS7 wrote

RexBolton64 wrote

ABSOLUTELY SPOT ON.

:-(

Oh shut up. :)

Why doe's this not seem to bother anyone else? I don't think this is an appropriate subject for mocking.

Edited: sorry, wrong post! I want ths printed on a hat.

5 comments, registered 10 years ago

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