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Sharapova retires from tennis; to pursue new career in modeling

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In a move that many thought would have come sooner, disgraced Russian tennis player Maria Sharapova, who is currently serving a two-year ban for failing a drugs test at the Australian Open back in January, officially announced her retirement today from the sport so that she can pursue a career in modeling. Speaking at a press conference in Moscow, Sharapova had this to say:

"After long consideration and deep meditation I have finally decided that it was about time that I called it quits from tennis. The good thing is that I am retiring with no regrets because I have won all four Grand Slams at least once in my life and although my rivalry with Serena was very lop-sided, at least I can still boast that I defeated her twice in my career including a Grand Slam final - Wimbledon 2004. I know that I let myself and my fans down with the Meldonium incident but one must realize the pressure that I was under. Many Russians were very critical of me and told me that I would not be considered a true Russian athlete if I didn't use PED's. I just had to be loyal to my country even though I reside in the United States and speak with a more American accent, I am still truly Russian in my heart."

An emotional Sharapova concluded.

Asked what will be her next move career-wise, Sharapova's mood changed as she had this response:

"I am so glad that you asked that because just yesterday I was contacted by a top New York-based modeling agency that works with a famous designer and was told that I have the right look. So you will be seeing more of me on the catwalk from now on. That is of course providing you can recognize me seeing that there are so many tall blondes in the modeling profession. The good thing about my leaving tennis is that at least from now on people will not have to put up with my annoying shrieking and my male fans won't get into trouble anymore when they wake up early in the morning to watch me play in the Australian Open and their wives and girlfriends mistake my shrieking for a scene from a porn movie."

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