The season of Advent which ushers in the Christmas season begins on Sunday and the Vatican is already making preparations to ensure that its roughly 840 inhabitants get into the Christmas spirit. And how exactly does the country's Head of State ensure that this happens? By officially banning the Christmas song Mary did you know? from its airways and from YouTube.
Speaking to reporters from Vatican City today, His Holiness Pope Francis had this to say:
"I was on YouTube yesterday and I just happened to stumble upon this video of the song called Mary did you know? I had never heard the song before so I was curious to hear what it said about our Mother. I listened attentively to the whole song and I was appalled at what I heard."
The Pontiff continued:
"The song is basically portraying Mother Mary as being ignorant and naïve about who her son Jesus would become. It asks her rhetorically if she knew that he would walk on water, and save our sons and daughters. But it was the fourth line of the first verse that I found most offensive and blasphemous."
He went on:
"It says: "this child that you've delivered will soon deliver you." I was outraged when I heard that. Mary was a sinless woman. Why would she need deliverance? If she was a sinner and needed deliverance like Protestants love to claim, then why is it that God the Father chose her to bear Jesus for nine months in her belly? So God would choose a sinful woman to bring forth his sinless son into the world? This is the type of so called logic that Protestants have. And they love to criticize us Catholics for our beliefs. But this is the kind of disregard that they have for the Mother of their Saviour. They are always trying to portray her in a negative light."
Then came the official announcement:
"This is why I, the Vicar of Christ and Holy Father have officially banned Mary did you know? from the airways, YouTube and all file-sharing sites in the Vatican. We cannot just sit back and encourage such blatant disregard for our Mother."
He then went on to speak of Mary;
"Don't they know that Mary is the Queen of Heaven as Revelation 12:1 indicates? She is majestic and powerful. She also reigns supreme with Jesus and is continually making intercessions on our behalf. Why do Protestants treat their Mother this way? Whether they like it or not she is their Mother. Jesus made her Mother of all mankind when he told the disciple from the cross: "there is your mother" in John 19:27. That scripture went on to tell us that from that day forth the disciple took her into his home. If the disciple can do that, then doesn't it stand to reason that we must also accept her as our mother too?"
"It's a pity that Protestants are too blind to see that. Especially the Lyricist Mark Lowry who wrote that blasphemous song and his accomplice Buddy Greene who wrote the music. This is why I must ensure that my children who follow me will not be lead astray by their ill-informed Protestant counterparts."