Labour MP for Outer Smeggleswick, Debs Dotamaya, 35, was jailed for three months for perverting the course of justice.
The offence related to a speeding ticket she received for driving 31mph in a 30mph area.
"It was a stitch-up," she said. "The dirty rozzers were waiting for me. Theresa May's little blue rent boys. She'll do anything to increase her majority. Power to the people!"
After being told she was not on television, Ms Dotamaya regained her composure remarkably quickly.
She initially denied driving and told the police, Conservative, her car had been hijacked by choir boys.
She later admitted that said choir boys, of no political affiliation, had agreed to "take the rap" in exchange for a jar of putty and tickets to a Little Mix concert.
The choir boys were sentenced to serve another year in Father Macready's choir. "They're good lads, really," he said upon their release, slapping them playfully around the ears as he led them to his stretch limo with blacked-out windows.
When she was read the charge of perverting the course of justice, Ms Dotamaya protested: "I'm a bloody MP! It's what we do every day for god's sake!"
The judge, Mr Justice Wilbur-Havelock-Norkbottom, Conservative, told the defendant that this was perversion of the worst kind and she "ought to be hanged" before being reminded that the case was not about a sexual offence. He apologised, adjourned the court for ten minutes while he retired to his chambers to adjust his stockings and suspenders.
After sentencing, the prosecution council, Sir Rigby Willoughby-Smythe, Conservative, said: "Justice has been done."
Comments
There are all sorts of reasons to loathe you, and this is one. Strange, I took a shit last night and it looked like this. :(.
edited: sorry, wrong post!
:(
ok write up, but marred by superficial errors that make the majority of it barely readable.