US News Entertainment

Rolf Harris jailed

story image about entertainment and jailed Rolf Harris - no extra words Zuzanna Neziri - Flickr: Rolf Harris
Report story

Rolf Harris, entertainer for millions from the 1960s onwards in Australia and Britain, will today be sentenced for the horrific crimes he has now been charged with. Harris, with a beautifully kempt mostly-white beard, and genuinely pleasant smile, has been charged with abusing multiple girls and women over a multi-decade period. Harris, 84, is the epitome of the 'unsuspected villain' - skilfull, articulate, and respected by peers (including the Queen, or at least her advisors), who allegedly took advantage of his position of power to abuse his victims in secret, and without suspicion.

And so - the world rejoices that one more 'memory from their youth' is presumably going to jail, hopefully for a long time, and possibly until he dies. If anything, the only question now is what satire and parody writers can actually say about this, if anything at all. The answer, if we're being honest, is that we either leap to creating crude and inappropriate jokes, or that we somehow avoid the issue altogether and pretend like it didn't happen. Both of these options are unpleasant - by avoiding the subject we're saying that he's beyond satire, which is untrue and unhelpful. Satire is a useful tool for analysis and metaphor. But if instead we choose to become overly obnoxious with our 'jokes' we're potentially damning his victims at the same time as damning him. There has to be a middle ground; something that will fairly lampoon a public figure who deserves our collective vitriol, while at the same time avoiding harmful stabs at his victims.

What is an appropriate satire for Harris' situation? To mockingly refer to his being raped in prison? Maybe. It would certainly be 'lex talionis' (a latin phrase I just discovered, which basically means an eye-for-an-eye) but I don't condone that. But at least it's specific to him. How about shaving his almost trademark beard? That would reduce his dignity and, possibly, puncture his sense of self. Yeah, that could work.

Harris to have iconic beard shaved by blind axeman

I don't want to run away from the subject - but I do want to publish a story about it. Sorry that it's boring, and probably naive.

Given Time, by Paul London Given Time, by Paul London

Get Weekly Funny Stuff in your Inbox

Subscribe to our weekly newsletter



Headlines like this

thumbnail for item Lottery winnings cash

Lottery winner gives full winnings to charity; immediately regrets decision

US News Entertainment 12

Recent lottery, or Lottomax, winner Sylvia Horsestring has begun legal proceedings to reclaim the winnings that she gifted to a charity....

read more
6 years ago
thumbnail for item This is not Delia Smith

Delia cooks children

US News Entertainment 0

Model chef, model, chef, and otherwise wonderful person Delia Smith, has today come under fire for apparently promoting the cannibalism of children....

read more
6 years ago

Comments

#1 @ 5 years ago
by HELP-REASON1 - Ghost

now listen here you little fuckers... come on, this is shite. don't fall for it; stop feeding the troll.

3 comments, registered 6 years ago
#2 @ 5 years ago
by amelie - Quiet veteran

HELP-REASON1 wrote

now listen here you little fuckers... come on, this is shite. don't fall for it; stop feeding the troll.

I do not know.

19 comments, registered 6 years ago
#3 @ 5 years ago
by Duck_Cap - Ghost

HELP-REASON1 wrote

now listen here you little fuckers... come on, this is shite. don't fall for it; stop feeding the troll.

You know when you turn on the radio and there are song lyris in your head... that's like this moment. Oh boy...

10 comments, registered 6 years ago
#4 @ 5 years ago
by Silk Beggar - Ghost

HELP-REASON1 wrote

now listen here you little fuckers... come on, this is shite. don't fall for it; stop feeding the troll.

Sweet write up, but marred by superficial errors that make the majority of it barely readable. I don't think this is an appropriate subject for mocking.

4 comments, registered 6 years ago
#5 @ 5 years ago
by BLADE RUNNER7 - Ghost

Duck_Cap wrote

HELP-REASON1 wrote

now listen here you little fuckers... come on, this is shite. don't fall for it; stop feeding the troll.

You know when you turn on the radio and there are song lyris in your head... that's like this moment. Oh boy...

bollcks. this makes me want to catheterise myself with a diseased tusk.

9 comments, registered 5 years ago
#6 @ 5 years ago
by HELP-REASON1 - Ghost

Duck_Cap wrote

HELP-REASON1 wrote

now listen here you little fuckers... come on, this is shite. don't fall for it; stop feeding the troll.

You know when you turn on the radio and there are song lyris in your head... that's like this moment. Oh boy...

i'm surprised more hasn't been made of how god-awful this is. what a waste of everyone's time, effort and energy.

:(

3 comments, registered 6 years ago
#7 @ 5 years ago
by WILLIAMDUKE7 - Quiet veteran

Duck_Cap wrote

HELP-REASON1 wrote

now listen here you little fuckers... come on, this is shite. don't fall for it; stop feeding the troll.

You know when you turn on the radio and there are song lyris in your head... that's like this moment. Oh boy...

meh with meh on top.

:)

12 comments, registered 6 years ago

To add a comment you must first sign up and login.

Given Time, by Paul London

Funny stuff

Get our funny weekly newsletters straight to your inbox
Subscribe to funny newsletter
... AND CLICK
or Find out more first

Consider checking us out and following us on social media:


Sagittarius horoscope

Harmless fun may come back to harm you over the coming weeks. Tailors and Bodybuilders may have a surprise in store......

Full horoscope

More from Laughsend

Tourism booming in Venezuela: A Laughsend Special Report   Punny History  
Write for Laughsend - it's easy and fun!
Free sign up / Login
Funny newsletter Funny RSS feed