Chef serves up those little berries that birds eat; arrested for killing 7

Chef Gimbault, 32, was arrested earlier today for accidentally killing 7 people during lunch service at his London restaurant "Exclamation?". Gimbault, whose first name is actually Chef, was said to be angry by the arrest, amidst suggestions that the deaths were more likely due to his patrons "poor palates".

"It's crazy!" he shouted while being bundled into the police car that sped him away from confused passers-by. "They shouldn't be arresting me - they should be awarding me fictitious numbers of stars!"

We immediately set about questioning the wives, husbands and other fellow diners of the deceased, to discover more about their collective fate. One woman, Geraldine Pop, was happy to discuss what had happened.

"Well - Bernard had his usual starter... something with chick peas I think. And a poached egg. But when main courses came he had this steak that looked a bit bloody for my liking. At first I thought it must have been that you know - the steak - what done him in. But apparently it was the, er, whatdyacallems - garnish! Yes, the garnish - which was these little berries all red and juicy, still on the stem. I thought they were redcurrants, but Bernie told me they definitely weren't, and they looked to him like those little red berries that birds eat. Well, Bernie's dead now so we'll never know for sure. I guess it'll be supper for one tonight."

Chef Gimbault's restaurant has now been closed by the Ministry of Sanitation and Horse Drugs, until this evening's service, which will be also be run by an angry man.