Man Loses Remote Control, Refuses To Get Off Couch

Fred Wooten, grocery store cashier and bachelor who lives alone with his cat, lost his television remote control approximately three weeks ago and has yet to change the channel the television was on when the remote was lost.

"I was watching an episode of The Bob Newhart Show and when it was over, Welcome Back Kotter came on, so naturally I wanted to change the channel, but the remote was nowhere to be found. I couldn't find the remote, mainly because I didn't feel like looking for it," Wooten said.

Wooten then went to bed without locating the remote and refused to use the buttons on the television to turn it off.

"I thought it would be a timesaver because then I wouldn't have to walk over to the TV and turn it back on. As the week went on, I just left the TV on the same station, after all, why should I waste my time looking for that damn remote? It'll turn up somewhere," Wooten added.

After about three weeks, Wooten still hadn't turned the station, and by his own admission, was getting really sick of the shows that were on.

"I come home from work and, since the TV has been on for the past few weeks straight, I just lay down on the couch all night and watch that station. But I'm getting really sick of that stupid news anchorman and especially the lame-ass sitcoms on at night.

"But I'm not going to waste my time looking for the remote or keep getting up to change the station every half hour. I even tried to train my cat to turn the channel so I wouldn't have to get up, but the damn thing kept turning it to the wrong stations," Wooten said.

Currently, Wooten has not located his remote control, although he does have a feeling he may be sitting on it.