World Sport

Tax Cheats Ready to Take Gold Medal in Olympic-style Games of Tax Evasion

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In what promises to be the most exciting event since the invention of indoor plumbing, tax cheats from all over the world are gearing up to compete in the first-ever Olympic-style games of tax evasion.

The roster of competitors reads like a who's who of notorious tax dodgers, including former IRS agent-turned-tax-fraudster "Slick" Willie Flimflam, infamous Swiss bank account-holder "Count" Viktor Von Steal, and perennial favorite, the self-proclaimed "King of Cayman" Islands, Sir Reginald Cheatemall.

While some members of the public are understandably skeptical about the event, many seem to be rooting for their favorite tax evaders. "I can't wait to see 'Slick' Willie Flimflam in action," said avid fan and occasional embezzler Tommy Thompson. "That man's got more moves than a bowl of Jell-O on a trampoline."

But not everyone is thrilled about the prospect of celebrating those who have avoided paying their fair share. "It's a disgrace," declared Debbie Downer, a real person we found on the street. "What kind of message does this send to our children? That cheating and lying are okay as long as you can get away with it? I shudder to think."

Despite the controversy, officials are confident that the games will be a huge success, with record-breaking profits expected from both ticket sales and merchandise. As one insider put it, "We're giving the people what they want " and what they want is to see a bunch of rich, sneaky bastards jumping through hoops."

The games begin next week, so get ready to cheer on your favorite tax cheat and witness history in the making. As the organizers of the event like to say, "In the game of tax evasion, the only rule is that there are no rules " except don't get caught."





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