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Edinburgh energy supplier folds blaming global warming and gnarly Scots.

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Scottish energy supplier, Oor Energy, ran out of gas blaming the current climate and "gnarly" Scots.

A spokesperson said: "Although it's the middle of winter, the Scots have not been using as much energy for heating as they have in the past. The ingrates."

They added: "If the Scots had only been as soft as the wussies in the south of England we'd still be in business. We've been praying for a really cold spell but there's obviously no God in these heathen parts."

The Scottish government had invested £10m into the company. A minister, who did not want to be named, said: "Bloody Sassenachs took their eye off the ball, eh! Too busy playing bloody politics. That's £2 for every man, woman and bairn. You could feed a family of four on that for a week!" He put on his tam o'shanter and pedalled away.

Ofgem said it would ensure business was conducted as usual until another energy supplier was appointed. Which would probably be English, although owned by some foreigner. But not Scots.

Given Time, by Paul London Given Time, by Paul London

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Given Time, by Paul London

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