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Tax cheats set to dodge, duck, dip, dive and dodge, in new reality television dodgeball show

story image about dodge and duck You can't dodge my balls
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Media-convicted UK tax dodgers are set to undergo a new form of trial this year as the criminal justice system tests a new form of crime prevention concept: reality TV dodgeball. In a brief statement released on Facebook by Judge MC Michaels, we have learned that any celebrity who the media arbitrarily decide has committed tax dodging in the UK, including Gary Barlow, Jimmy Carr and Chris Moyles, will be set to face an "it's-a-knockout-cum-total-wipeout" type experience, with DodgeBall UK, an ESPN Ocho cross Atlantic exclusive.

"We're excited," claimed Executive Producer Donald Rumsfeld (no relation). "We think this could be the turning point in light entertainment. Dodgeball - it's the sport of kings."

When queried as to what 'turning point' referred to, the static on the phone line became unbearable, but we assumed he said something amusing, like, he was talking about the "turning off point".

At this point it's unclear as to whether the likes of Barlow, Carr and Moyles will be forced to attend the dodgeball showdown of the century, and it is equally unclear whether they will be forced to wear spandex for our viewing pleasure. However, it is certain that the Crown Prosecution Service have more whacky ideas up their sleeve. The honourable MC Michaels continued in her Facebook page:

"We want to see them being strung up by their gonads. We want to see people being branded, literally red-hot-metal branded, with the word 'thief', onto their foreheads. We want to know what black pudding tastes like if we use celebrity blood. Peace out."

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Comments

#1 @ 3 years ago
by sheet-bird153 - Ghost

whatevr? adequate.

2 comments, registered 3 years ago
#2 @ 3 years ago
by slumdog millionaire0 - Ghost

sheet-bird153 wrote

whatevr? adequate.

There is nothing more offputting than people spouting about items they clearly know nothing about. I didn't see this because it neither offended nor excited me. I also make obvious comment's in real life.

8 comments, registered 3 years ago
#3 @ 3 years ago
by AntsBarracuda - Quiet veteran

sheet-bird153 wrote

whatevr? adequate.

Edited: sorry, wrong post!

12 comments, registered 5 years ago
#4 @ 3 years ago
by Fred Kidd-Dunlap999 - Ghost

There are a plethora of amazing stuff crawling around - and this makes me need to cry. This is the most effectiveest piece of work I have ever seen online.

7 comments, registered 3 years ago
#5 @ 3 years ago
by IncreaseJewel - One-off wonder

Poop. Effective write up, but marred by superficial errors that make the majority of it barely readable.

1 comment, registered 4 years ago
#6 @ 3 years ago
by d-woodward-mooney777 - Ghost

There's something in here that intrigues me... and I think it's how on earth anyone can read it without dying from boredom.

4 comments, registered 3 years ago
#7 @ 3 years ago
by Appliance Weasel1989 - Ghost

I just do not like this kind of thing, and it really bugs me that everyone else thinks it's o.

3 comments, registered 3 years ago
#8 @ 3 years ago
by stingray-apple - Ghost

Appliance Weasel1989 wrote

I just do not like this kind of thing, and it really bugs me that everyone else thinks it's o.

I ENJOY THIS.

4 comments, registered 3 years ago
#9 @ 3 years ago
by chin clocks - Ghost

slumdog millionaire0 wrote

sheet-bird153 wrote

whatevr? adequate.

There is nothing more offputting than people spouting about items they clearly know nothing about. I didn't see this because it neither offended nor excited me. I also make obvious comment's in real life.

none of that makes any sense. :(

4 comments, registered 3 years ago
#10 @ 3 years ago
by herman-key162 - One-off wonder

slumdog millionaire0 wrote

sheet-bird153 wrote

whatevr? adequate.

There is nothing more offputting than people spouting about items they clearly know nothing about. I didn't see this because it neither offended nor excited me. I also make obvious comment's in real life.

You are spurious. Your contradicting yourself.

1 comment, registered 3 years ago

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