Health

They're Not as Monstrous as We Thought!

Read story They're Not as Monstrous as We Thought!

In a shocking discovery, scientists have found that monsters are not actually the terrifying creatures we thought they were. Afte...

Disappointed Fans Realise They'll Never Hear Carpool Karaoke Again as Adele and James Corden Reach Peak Performance

UK News 0

Yesterday, reports emerged that Adele and James Corden had been reunited for one last Carpool Karaoke performance. Fans were delighted at the news, but soon realised the implications of this last hurrah. One fan lamented, "I can't believe we'll never hear James fumbling over the words to 'Hello' again. It's the end of an era!

Study: Elderly Toxic to Society

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The officials at the World Health Organization have confirmed their suspicion that elderly people are simply not healthy for the rest of...

Local Resident Arrested for Sneezing Like a Speeding Train

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In a shocking turn of events, a man has been taken into custody for sneezing too loudly in public. The incident took place inside New York's Central Park where the sneeze could reportedly be heard from two blocks away, causing mass panic among the residents....

Adidas announced Kanye collab to clean up UK beaches

UK News 0

LONDON - Awash with a patriotic spirit to protect the nation's coastlines, global sportswear brand Adidas have announced they will donate ten per cent of all sales of their fashion-shoe collab with rapper Kanye West to efforts to clean up UK beaches....

Local Farmer Shocked to Discover Cows Could Fly, But Chose Not To

UK News 0

In a groundbreaking discovery, local dairy farmer, Bob Johnson, made a startling revelation after noticing a group of his cows levitating in the fields....

Pharma company to start selling anti-viagra as answer to date-rape drugs

World 2

A pharmaceutical company based in England is set to start selling what has been dubbed as "anti-viagra", in some quarters, due to its ability to render a penis flaccid and unusable for up to 48 hours. The drug, whose chemical name is Lifeanedlis (which is Sildenafil in reverse),...

You only live three times, says renowned James Bond enemy

World 0

In the world of spies and spy related shenanigans, there is no better known arch-enemy than Rnst Blomee. For decades, British spy James Bond, also known as 007, has been at loggerheads with Blomee, and today Mr Bond's large, balding uber-opponent has released a statement contradicting the spy's claim that spies only live twice....

Brexit Supply Chain Issues Bring Joy to School Children: No More Vegetables Means More Pizza and Sweeties!

UK News Politics 0

LONDON, UK - In the wake of Brexit, the UK is facing an ongoing shortage of fresh fruit and vegetables. While this has been a cause for concern for many, there is one group that is overjoyed by the news: school children....

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